I saw many attractive women, and parts of them that I wouldn’t ordinarily see on a day to day basis here in Canada. Also, there were men, not too many attractive men, but rather many men with bulges in their speedo’s that would put mine to a crying shame. Some of them made me tense up, not being used to seeing such a thing. Sometimes I wouldn’t hide the fact that I was looking, and even went as far as to make eye contact and to gently bite my bottom lip, as if to look subconscious, hoping that they might see that I like what I see.
While tanning on the beach, which I did every day, I was laying on a beach chair in front of a beautiful woman, and was eying her up and down with my sunglasses on, thinking that she couldn’t see my eyes. I was staring at her camel-toe, and watching her re-adjust her bikini top, especially when she was tanning on her back and I could see her breasts under the weight of her body.
I drifted into thought…She gets up, smiles at me and heads towards the bar by the beach, and when over there, she signals for me to join her. My girlfriend is asleep on the beach chair, so I figure ‘why not’.. I’m not going to take it anywhere, just a simple chat. I had been ordering virgin bloody mary’s all week long, as I’m not a drinker anymore. I like to keep it healthy. She ordered a shot of tequila with no chaser and said the same for him. Wanting to appear as a man, I obliged, and took the shot in one take. I wished for a chaser, badly, but with none to be had, I tried to pretend it was nothing. She ordered another right away, and before I took the second, I felt the first start to kick in, and felt a light, swirly feeling in my body. It was on the second shot that my head started to get airy..
I was no match for alcohol, and I knew it. I had to sit down. She grabbed another two shots and came and sat by me. We hadn’t yet spoken, and I was starting to feel a little anxious about what was happening so quickly. I don’t drink, and my girlfriend knows this. How will I ever explain my sudden ‘urge’ to drink? Will I get sick? What if I say something stupid? The first thing I said was I don’t feel so well, and she said another shot would help - that I just needed to get over the hump.. not knowing exactly what she meant, but being very impressionable at this point, I took up on her offer. Maybe she was right, because I started to lose my inhibitions, and felt like a different person. I was starting to feel confident.
I was ready to talk, but before I could say anything, she said come with me. I paused at first, but as she was walking away, she looked over her shoulder and signaled with her finger to follow. I followed behind her, like a child following their mother, only I was staring at her legs and her ass, wet with suntan oil, swaying back and forth in the hot sun.
She then brings me to the washrooms behind the bar. She chooses the men’s washroom. I would normally be a nervous wreck, knowing that my girlfriend is still on the beach, and having never played this type of game, but the alcohol has wiped away any inhibitions.
She doesn’t say anything. She brings me into a stall, and uses her eyes and her body to speak volumes. She wastes no time, and presses herself against my body, her breasts pressing against me ever so softly, and her pussy pushing forward, into me, against my growing bulge.
I am paralyzed with shock, with my boyish ways, not quite a man, not knowing what to do. She sees this and immediately knows what she’s dealing with. That’s when she reaches down while looking me in the eyes. I can see her pupils are large, and her lips are parted, almost as if to say “fuck me”, that she has all intentions of taking my youth’s innocence away, and claiming me as her own. When she reaches for my package, I see her pupils return to small and she forms a little smirk on her lips, with one eyebrow raising, realizing that shes dealing with a boy, or a man who was not necessarily born to please women - rather something in between. I can feel my face go flush, and my little cock starts to retreat even more, knowing the rejection that is about to come.
Without any further hesitation, she pushed me down onto my knees, onto the dirty floor - the floor I had assumed she would be staining and bruising her knees on..
With a knowing smile, she holds my jaw and tells me to pull my swim-shorts down, and to take off my swim-top. I thought I was fooling everyone with this tight-fitting top, that it flattened out my chest, and made it look like other men’s chests.. but when I took it off, all pretensions of this were long gone. My chest, a full C cup released and took rest, and below, my two inch cock just sat there, smaller than it would have normally been, having just come in from the ocean and was still warming up. My balls were tight and much less than a handful’s worth. I was completely shaven, only adding to my adolescent, pubescent look. I have never felt any less of a man than at this point.
Her eyes widened, and I could see the power growing in her eyes, in her posture. She spread her legs almost three feet apart, and pushed her covered pussy towards my face, while pulling me in with her hands. I could feel her heat radiating off of her, and smell her womanly scent, sweet and a little musky. She smelled what I always imagined a mature woman would smell like.. her scent drew me inwards, making me feel taken care of, making me feel like a child. I felt safe in her presence.
She pulled her red bikini bottoms down, to reveal a pussy with a trim bush above and a tight, shaven pussy below. It was glistening with cum, appearing as if she had been wet all day, perhaps looking for the right man, or even boy, to devour. I put my hands on her thighs, and she immediately took them off of her, telling me to instead show her how well I can cup my breasts, the breasts I’ve been trying to hide.
I immediately froze, not expecting to hear such a thing, but safe as I felt, I did what she said, and put my cold hands onto my breasts, immediately making them stiffen at the nipples, and giving them goose-bumps, sending an electric shiver down my spine and into my cock. I felt my awareness grow into all my erogenous zones, awakening the desire within me.
Leaning even closer, she grabs the back of my head and pushes me into her, slightly underneath her. I just stayed there, with her wet, hot pussy against my mouth and nose, not daring to move. I knew she wanted to call the shots, and I was learning that I liked it this way. She said not to lick her pussy, but to push my tongue further back and to lick her tight ass instead. She said that her pussy was for real men, or at least men with an adequate-sized cock, where I, on the other hand was built to be a woman.. I must have been born in the wrong body. I felt a wave of shame pass over me, sinking me deeper into that sub-space where I was quickly learning I had never felt so good.
Sticking my tongue out, I couldn’t help but taste her juices, and feel her soft, wet pussy, slightly parted and swollen, opening for what I’m sure she was hoping was a real cock, or maybe this is what she wanted, maybe she could read me before I even knew she was interested in me. Maybe she had this planned from when I first laid down on the beach chair.. pushing further, as much as I wanted to stay in that warm, wet place between her thighs, my tongue made it towards her tight little ass, all the while her cum started getting on my face and even up my nose.. I was drowning in her intoxicating juices. The more I licked her ass, the wetter she seemed to get. I could feel her ass tighten and feel her pussy muscles contract, then more cum.. I’ve never been on the ‘giving’ end quite like this. This is what women must feel like, I think to myself, while giving her the best I can possibly give, giving myself to her every whim.
My cock started to grow, but not being able to see it, it felt as if it were no bigger than three or four inches long.. it felt rejected, so alone, and I was not going to attempt to touch it for I was starting to get the feel for what I think she required of me. I would wait for her to allow me to touch it. My hips started to pump at the air, and it looked like I was either trying to push into something, or back on something, while playing with my breasts.
Tilting my head back, she said that a boy like me should have no business trying to pass as a man, and that I would be much happier if I just accepted my position and didn’t try to hide it, that I would draw in the kind of people I was looking for all along. It was just chance that she also happened to be one of these women.. she knew everything I wanted, even before I did. Then she put her pussy square on my mouth, and told me to clamp down on it, on her swollen, sticky, shaven pussy. She told me to follow her orders exactly.
She said that a boy like me has too much of something called estrogen. She explained that my body is making it because I relate too much with the opposite sex, that I don’t want to be ‘with’ them, but rather I want to ‘be’ them. She said she knew my type, and the sooner I listened and didn’t try to protest, the more I would learn about myself before she let me go back to my old life back on the beach. She said that what she was about to do would be something that I would never be able to ignore again, and would come to crave it at any opportunity available, that this encounter will forever be ingrained in my memory, and will be that place I go to every time I am alone with myself, or even with another, that the energy of this moment will forever be a part of me, and tied to me, especially sexually. She explained that she can see it in my eyes that there is no turning back, that this is what I’ve been looking for ever since I was discovering myself as a young adult, discovering my body, and my needs.
She asked me if I trusted her, that she knows what I need, and while I was still clamped onto her pussy, I looked up at her, and nodded yes, while a muffled “mm-hmm” came out from my mouth and into her pussy. Then I felt a short warm spray, salty to taste, hit my tongue and dance to the back of my mouth. I thought to myself, this isn’t the cum I know of.. maybe this is what they call “squirting”.. She asked if I liked it, knowing fully well that I did, and old me to swallow. She said this is it, this is what I will forever crave.. that I will always try and re-enact this moment - my submission, my being in a men’s environment, but not like them, that constant reminder.. smelling their urine around the toilets, something I thought I would never do, or like, having their scent on my knees, on my bare feet, my hands, which were now on my breasts. My exposing myself publicly, stripping naked in a public washroom, with myself able to be seen, obviously on my knees underneath the stall door. I would grow attached to the psychological feeling of letting go of my old ways, of trying to hold onto being a man, and embracing the ‘other’ me that has been inside, waiting to get out.
She told me to swallow, and as soon as I did, another full flood came to fill my mouth, within seconds, and started to dribble out onto my breasts and down onto my stiff, untouched cock and balls, then onto the floor, splashing onto my inner thighs. It was now that I knew what it was and she told me to swallow, once again. This time it was gulps, and a part of me wanted nothing to do with it, having heard that only certain ‘sick’ people do it. But the other part of me knew that I ‘was’ one of those people, that the minute it landed on my tongue, I would want it again. With no further ado, I started to gulp it down, and while I made more room in my mouth, she continued to fill me up. While I was in the middle of this new-found glory, she told me that this is how I would come to get my extra estrogen, to help me along the path of being the girl I was meant to be. My cock throbbed, hearing this, and I couldn’t be sure, but it felt as if it were leaking, almost as if I too, was peeing, but it felt different… I knew it was not possible to pee while hard. I was so humiliated, to be what I felt was cumming in this way, without any touch, on the bathroom floor, surrounded by men’s urine, and while drinking the urine of a woman, a real woman who knew my inner-most desires. All I could do was keep swallowing, saying goodbye, mentally, to the old me.
I was losing myself, the image of who I thought I was, like other men on the beach. I had never been to such a place, inside. I have never seen this side of me before, but tasting it now, for the first time, I know I cannot return to the old me. I may try to, for the sake of ‘fitting in’, but I know now that I am not like them, in fact, I am nothing like them, except for the fact that I was born male. I was starting to believe that I was born right down the middle. I was not well-endowed like others, and I did not have a flat chest like the others, in fact, I didn’t even think like the others, come to think of it. I wrote poetry in my teenage years, I drank wine, I was an emotional wreck, I longed for love and had body issues, I cared about fashion to a degree, looking good, and feeling good. I secretly liked taking baths with the lights dimmed, and with bubbles up to my ears. I grew my hair long, to my bellybutton, and passed it off as a hippy thing, which I truly believed it was. I wasn’t into sports, had a hard time holding down a real job because it didn’t have any heart, was intimidated by other men… rather I had a great passion to cook, and to clean. I felt relaxed when I cleaned, and wouldn’t think twice to clean someone else’s mess. Only now, looking back, does it all make sense.
She told me that I was a good girl, and those words went off like a bell in my head. She was still talking, but I was in a daze.. how had I come to this? I realized that my life was forever changed. Would I still have a relationship with the girl I loved for so long? I don’t know that I could face her, with what just happened… I never expected it to go this far. I heard the lady saying that she’s been doing this to ‘boys’ like me for years now, that she knows exactly what we want, and that we will go chasing after ladies like her afterward, with no other choice but to fulfill the seed that she has planted. She said that now, she is going to find a real man to fuck her, now that she’s all wet and ready, and that that man will make her feel just like I do, like a cheap, desperate, kinky girl who will constantly need satisfying… to recreate that one special moment that forever changed her life.
She told me to stay on my knees after she left, to leave myself exposed just as I was, with her urine on the floor around me, and on me, not to mention in me, mixed with the men’s urine, and to close my eyes and breathe it all in, to mentally take in what just happened, as it might not ever happen again. She said if I leave the door unlocked, another man may accidentally walk in, and perhaps like what he sees. She said that my type would like this kind of ‘happy mistake’, to be treated fully, as a girl would be treated. She said I would come to play with my little cock less and less, and start to want my ‘pussy’ played with, instead.
As she was pulling up her bikini bottoms, and wiggling her hips into them, she said that this is addictive, my growing desire, and it can never be fully fulfilled.. something about desire being a bottomless pit. With that said, she patted me on the head, and grabbed me by the chin, my mouth agape, and held it, with her thumb in my mouth, and closed my mouth with the same hand.. and without second thought, I started to suck on her thumb. She smiled, almost broke into laughter, while pushing it in and out a few times, and reached down to pinch my nipples, watching my eyes close and my body start to thrust. She took her dirty foot and pushed at my cock, tucking it between my legs, saying “there, that looks better.. I want you to stay like that for a while, after I’m gone. Let this all sink in. And you can play with yourself if you like, but I know your type, and you’ll come to abandon your old ways…”
She pulled out her thumb quickly, my mouth making an audible ‘pop’ sound, and before I opened my eyes, I heard the stall door shut, and just saw a glimpse of her red bikini through the crack of the stall, and then heard the washroom door click shut. I was alone, it was over. My life forever changed. My old life still waiting outside, on the beach, and back at home.
I could still taste her in my mouth, and smell her cum on my face, in my nose. I wanted to go back in time, to stay in that warm place she brought me into, introduced me to. I wanted to leave that washroom as her, to be her, so that my journey as who I am now wouldn’t be so difficult for me.
I wasn’t ready to think about all of that just yet. I closed my eyes, squeezed my thighs together, with myself tucked back, inhaled my surroundings, and played with my new-found tits, knowing that they will never go away.. and that this new need will only continue to grow from now on.
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